Communication Beat

Many spiritual traditions revolve around one central question: “Who am I ?” Even the business world ponders this crucial matter. According to business gurus, the first step on the road to success is asking yourself this very question:”What’s my mission? What on Earth am I doing? Am I in the right place?”

If you can’t answer these questions, then you are wasting 90% of your time and energy doing things that are neither your mission nor your business! You will feel an inner anxiety, urging you to search for the deeper meaning of your life.

If you consider living to be painful, if you feel dissatisfied, if you feel “there must be more than this”, if you feel out of place in this world, then you have not yet found the purpose of your life.

If you are questioning the meaning of life, if you can’t find inner peace, if you are not satisfied with choices you’ve made in life, if you don’t know which way to turn, if you feel your life is stuffed with things that aren’t of your choosing and that don’t satisfy you, if you often feel burdened and bad-tempered, if you “have everything to feel happy” but don’t, then it is time for you to discover your true self!

Human beings want to feel useful. We long to give our lives some deeper meaning. As long as you have not discovered this deeper meaning, you feel frustrated and on the wrong track.

We want our lives to be worthwhile. This does not mean we need to achieve ‘great feats’ or become world famous. We just need to feel in place and do the right thing surrounded by the right people. It’s about finding out our mission. It’s about finding ‘inner peace’.

Our mission on Earth is twofold. The general aspect is that we are here to learn to bring more love into the world. The personal aspect is that everyone has its own peculiar, unique way of doing this.

Your mission represents the central piece of your life. The surrounding pieces represent your family, your relationship, your kids, your job, your home, your health, your friend, and so on. The centerpiece holds all of this together. That centerpiece, that’s you. You are the most important person in your life, and you came to this world to do something important. Otherwise you simply would not be here!

As long as you haven’t identified the centerpiece, you’ll be wrestling with dissatisfaction, powerlessness, frustrations and fatigue. Some people solve jigsaw puzzles by first fitting all the pieces on the borders, and then squeeze in the piece in the middle. That’s putting the cart before the horse.

These people reason: “When I find the right partner, find the right job, get paid a good salary, have some kids, have my own house, meet some friends, stay healthy, then I will be happy!” But that’s not the way things work.

As long as the centerpiece is missing from the puzzle, you too will feel empty inside. It is your responsibility to discover your mission and get things under way.

Even the cells of your body react to this lack of purpose, this feeling of emptiness. They suffer from spiritual malnutrition, feel useless and bored, resulting in a physical state of sluggishness and lethargy. This physical state will eventually cause several physical discomforts and complaints.

Occupying yourself with “your disease” and “feeding” yourself with medication or other such products is just another attempt at filling the void inside. This is because the status of “being ill” allows you to identify: “I am allergic to this or that, I am a cancer patient, I am an Alzheimer, I am…” Once you have started identifying yourself by your disease, it will certainly be on your mind day and night.

If you are not in touch with your own desires, you will easily fall prey to expectations projected upon you by your environment. If you are not following your own path, then you must be following someone else’s! If you are not clear on your own life mission, you will find it hard to say “no” to what other people want you to do. This undecidedness makes you available for all who cross your path and want a piece of you, draining your energy.

As long as you are not clear on the shape of that centerpiece, you are submitted to others who may not care about what’s best for you. Just like disease, these kinds of negative relationships are a manifestation of low-level energy, showing that you have lost focus and have strayed from your own golden brick road.

Your self-esteem is probably pretty low and you suffer from serious doubts and fears. The longer you put of the search, the more the feeling that something is missing will devour you. Your self-esteem will only decrease.

The best way to rebuild your fragile self and re-establish an inner sense of security is to make the search for your life mission your number one priority, and subsequently fully dedicate yourself to it.

Why is this so important? Because you can only find real joy in life by discovering and living according to the unique way of your personal evolution.

But, maybe you think, can’t I just continue living life the way I have been all along? My life may not be all that exciting and rosy, but it’s still doable. Can’t I just try to hang in there and keep the status quo?

The answer is “yes”. You can keep living your life in a monotonic, sad, senseless way. But don’t expect any real satisfaction. The need to feel useful is so fundamental that you cannot feel happy as long as you have no clue what you are here for.

That’s exactly the difference between humans and animals. For an animal it may suffice to just sleep, hunt and eat, but humans look for the deeper meaning of life. Humans “know” that we are here on Earth for something more important than just eating, sleeping and working.

Your mission gives meaning to your life. Your mission IS your very reason for existence.

You are not alone in this search. This mission is also looking for you. It wants to be fulfilled by you and by nobody else. It is your personal mission. Nobody else is equipped to do it for you. Your mission will keep haunting you until you take it seriously and start implementing it.

Going against your mission is going against yourself. This is the same as ignoring the call of your soul, as ignoring your strongest desires, as signing a contract for eternal discontent…

You can’t escape your mission. One day you will have to start dedicating yourself to it. Has this day come for you now? After all, you are reading these lines which shows your honest desire to start looking for the deeper meaning of your being.

Be bright today to analyze if you have a nice offer or if you don’t with the moneylender that offers you a loan. 18.6 percent loan rate may come out so acceptable but will that be unvaried after you have to pay off your loan. It doesn’t matter if you live in Monroe Louisiana or in Apple Valley California a upright online investigation will unbosom you often a lot of problems. now you need to look into and examine if you can have a bank loan at a good percent interest rate. A merchant bank in Cerritos California or so may have a total completely different actual rate of interest for a 7500 dollar bank loan then a bank in Bristol Tennessee and that makes a large clear difference in your monthly costs. Investigate to see if the moneylender who wants to give you a credit loan is good. At present you can check up on rates quickly on the internet and foresee if there are possible traps you should be aware of. Many of the merchant banks wil show you a rate of interest that looks proficient but feels naughtily or so after a period of time.

The Dutch translation says: Woon je in Uithoorn of Hendrik-Ido-Ambacht en heb je BKR registratie. Lenen met zonder BKR registratie is nog nooit zo eenvoudig geweest. Verwen jezelf met een andere auto met lenen met negatieve bkr, 127303 euro is geen probleem om te lenen. Van Oldenzaal tot Oostflakkee, financieren met zonder BKR is altijd mogelijk.

Chamonix Mont Blanc France is a one of a kind ski resort with the towering Mont Blanc and majestic glaciers. We enjoy going walking or even sightseeing. I normally fly from Hampstead and stay at a Chamonix guesthouse for the duration of my holiday.

My friends and I used to stayed in Wyndham Elysian Beach but it sometimes didn’t live up to its marketing: Elysian Beach Resort is a beachfront resort nestled on the white-sand cove at Cowpet Bay, on the island’s desirable East End, and approximately 13 miles from Cyril E. King/St. Thomas International Airport. The resort is next to the Saint Thomas Yacht Club, one mile from Red Hook and the ferry to Saint John, and nine miles from duty-free shopping in Charlotte Amalie. The property’s amenities include the stretch of beach, health club and fitness center (with spa and sauna), swimming pool (with waterfall and hot tub), watersports center, two restaurants, and three bars.

In comparison in Chamonix town the guesthouse is invariably exceptional. Even dining out in our number one bar, Dairy Queen of Hamilton, munching carrot cake cheesecake is a delight. Chamonix Mont Blanc France is a large enough place to make sure that there is lots for the skier to do. Amongst other things it includes a cinema and a shopping arcade of designer boutiques, Chamonix provides a mix of climbing, French alpine charm and sightseeing which barely any ski resorts can hope to rival.

Receiving order is far less motivating than taking part in planning and decision-making. Hence, it is important for a person, who is in-charge of some organization or a company to know how to inspire their work group or their staffing order to motivate them to work on their best.

It is important to enable your group or your staff to achieve their ambitions and to manage themselves in order to achieve the desired results.

When inspiring or motivating somebody, it is important to inform people about strategic plans and their own part in achieving the strategies. Take trouble to improve the understanding with your colleague and win their approval, as this will have a highly influence on their performance.

It is best to motivate a person by enabling them to feel good about the group or organization that they belong to and its administration.

Moreover, as a person who is in the authority to influence and inspire other people, you are likely to be a role model, the person who sets the tone of the unit. You must also create the right atmosphere for successful teamwork and use example purposefully to teach and encourage good preparation.

Inspiring People

According to research, there are ten personal qualities that are the most admired characteristics of respected organizational leaders. These qualities are less to do with making the right or wrong decisions and more to do with integrity and straightforward behavior.

Here is a list of the desirable qualities that a person must possess in order to inspire the people around them.

1. Competence

It is important for any person to be endowed with the proper and necessary trainings in order to develop the needed skills to be competent in the industry.

A person who knows many things and is capable of doing many things is admired by most organizations and companies in the world. This is because people who are competent will be able to perform properly and effectively the task given to them.

2. Supportiveness

For people who know how to extend support to those who truly needs one is admirable enough to encourage others to do the same.

The value of supportiveness motivates people to work on things on the best of their ability and the confidence that there will be people who are more than willing to guide them through in case things get out of hand.

3. Charisma

Not all people have this quality. However, for those who have this personality, it is best to use it in such a way that would motivate people to work hard and to go on with their lives.

It is that kind of motivation that some people need in order to survive in life. Therefore, if you have a charismatic personality, it is best to inspire more people and let them see how beautiful life can be.

4. Fair-mindedness

In a world that is so full of inequities and inequalities, sometimes it is just so hard to be very fair. Nevertheless, the absence of bias and prejudice is such an admirable trait in a person.

Hence, it is important for somebody to maintain the quality of being fair-minded in order to motivate people to do the same thing. In the end, if people are more fair with regards to whatever concepts and ideas there are in life, life can be quite good.

5. Honesty

With the hardships and difficulties of times, sometimes people have the tendency to neglect the value of honesty. That is why it is so admirable to know a person who remains to be an honest person despite of many things that entice him or her to do bad or to give in to temptation.

Especially in the world where life is a constant struggle to survival and everything seems to be a game, an honest person will truly inspire the world.

6. Intelligence

It takes great knowledge, wisdom, and skill to be an intelligent person. Hence, people admire those who are intelligent enough to prove to the world that they can do whatever they think will do them good and to be intellectually capable of staying upright as a rational being.

7. Courage

Not all people have the courage to take risk when needed. Hence, for people who are brave enough to overcome risks and all odds at all costs, they are most likely the people who will succeed in life.

8. Broad-mindedness

There are people who have such a prejudiced thinking. In the end, they have the tendency to cast doubts on people and the propensity to be pessimistic.

But for people who are broad-minded, things will appear brighter and clearer. Hence, they see things in a more positive way.

9. Directness

People who have directions and goals in life are the ones who will most likely to succeed. Hence, being direct and sincere are the qualities that people admire.

10. Vision

It is admirable for a person who knows how to see things in a positive way, knows what is good, and is able to foresee the goodness in everything.

This show how a person can be optimistic by seeing through the future, hence, giving him or her the chance to develop a scheme that would be beneficial to the organization.

Acquiring all these skills, an individual can drive motivation to other people who need a little push and inspiration.

In aviation, the word “attitude” is a term that refers to the angle that the plane meets the wind, if the wings are level with the horizon and whether the aircraft is climbing or descending. The pilot who fails to take responsibility for the attitude of his or her aircraft is in serious trouble. And likewise, any leader who fails to control his or her thoughts and take responsibility for their attitude runs a similar risk.

As a sales manager, you not only set the pace for your sales team, but you’re responsible for setting the tone as well. For better or worse, the leader’s attitude is contagious and permeates throughout their organization. Positive, upbeat companies are always led by positive, upbeat managers.

While we’re not always able to control our circumstances, we can and must control how we respond to life’s difficulties, setbacks and challenges. We have a choice about how our day is going to be.

How often do you talk to yourself and what do you say? Research in the field of psychology indicates that the average person maintains an ongoing mental dialog, or “self-talk,” of between 150 to 300 words per minute. Unfortunately, not all of these thoughts are positive. In fact, it has been estimated that of the thousands of thoughts we have each day, approximately 40 percent of them tend to be negative and self-critical in nature. Most of us are generally unaware of this negative background chatter, let alone its sabotaging effect on our emotional state, performance and well-being.

“Watch your thoughts, for they become words. Choose your words, for they become actions. Understand your actions, for they become habits. Study your habits, for they will become your character. Develop your character, for it becomes your destiny.”

- Anonymous

Earl Nightingale, cofounder of the Nightingale-Conant Corp., concluded that life’s “strangest secret” is that you become what you think about all day long. If you want to know where your predominant thoughts lie and what you believe, look at what you’re experiencing in your life. Your thoughts are creative by nature and express themselves through your emotions, which in turn, drive your actions. Everything you say both positive and negative is in fact an affirmation and reflects your belief.

Whatever you think, feel or say about your life today is the scaffolding that builds the events you will experience in the future.

Affirmation and Positive Self-Talk William Shakespeare said, “nothing is good or bad, but thinking makes it so.” The first step in the process of changing your belief system is to monitor your thoughts and the next step is to control them through the power of choice. Once you become conscious of the critical aspects of your internal dialogue, you can choose to reframe your negative thoughts by substituting affirmative statements.

World-class athletes understand the value of affirmation and recognize the impact of their mental preparation on their physical performance. They use the power of positive affirmation to reduce anxiety and increase their expectation of achievement. To be of maximum benefit an affirmation must be simple, encouraging and stated in the present tense. By repeating an affirmation over and over again it becomes embedded in the subconscious mind.

Do affirmations really work and can they propel a person to greatness? As a teenager beginning his boxing career in Louisville, Kentucky, Cassius Clay would frequently affirm, “I am the greatest of all time!” While many considered him boastful and few took this eighty-nine pound, twelve year old seriously, Mohammad Ali used the power of affirmation to become the greatest boxer of all time and arguably the most recognizable sports figure in the world. Henry Ford was right when he said, “Whether you think you can or think you can’t – you’re right.” Your belief system, like your computer, doesn’t judge what you input; it simply accepts it as the truth. The key to cultivating and maintaining a positive mental attitude is to use your power of choice and take control of your thinking. It’s a challenging task to develop a calm, focused mind, but well worth the effort.

Action Plan: Here are some suggestions to help you have a good day every day.

1. Establish the habit of getting up early. 2. Upon rising, read or listen to something positive and nspirational. Clinical studies indicate that our mind is most receptive to suggestion during the first 15-minutes upon awakening. Here are some books that will help you start your day off on the right foot.

“How I Raised Myself From Failure to Success in Selling” by Frank Bettger

“The Magic Of Believing” by Claude M. Bristol

“You’ll See It When You Believe It” by Dr. Wayne W. Dyer

“The Power Of Positive Thinking” by Dr. Norman Vincent Peale

“Think and Grow Rich” by Dr. Napoleon Hill

“Psycho-Cybernetics” by Dr. Maxwell Maltz

3. Take a few moments to consider the upcoming activities of your day. Visualize events flowing. See people accept your ideas and your day unfolding in a harmonious and productive way. This is a good time to verbalize your affirmations.

4. Take time for some physical exercise. 5. At noon, take a 10-minute mental break to relax and replenish your energy

Landscaping golf courses is nothing like making a flat rice paddy. A well-made golf course is a perfectly planned, verdant place that’s equal parts artificial pizzazz and natural beauty.

Sprawling anywhere from 6,500 to 7,000 yards, any golf course consists of 18 segments called holes. In golf landscaping, each hole may stretch up to 600 yards.

For a player to successfully complete one hole, he or she has to drive the ball into cylindrical metal or plastic containers called cups. Flags often mark where the cups are.

Cups are typically embedded 4 inches deep into the putting green, a section of closely cropped grass. Landscapers design the putting green in a way that it lets the ball travel a particular path after it has been propelled by a gentle stroke called putt.

At the other end of the cup is the tee, a slightly elevated rectangular area. Golfers begin the game from the tee, whence the ball is propelled towards the holes or cups.

From the first tee, the ball is driven onto the 100-yard fairway. For golf landscapers, this is the main part of the golf course so it is one of the most meticulously tended. For instance, the grass on the fairway is deliberately cropped low.

Flanking each side of the fairway is the rough, formed by bushes, grasses, trees and other vegetation. The rough is intended as one of many hazards, those physical obstacles in the game. Bodies of water like ponds, ditches, and lakes are hazards.

Alternatively, mounds, embankments and other artificial hazards may be created. One ubiquitous artificial golf hazard is the trap or bunker, sand-filled hollows dug in the course.

With great landscaping, golf courses can be idyllic places to be. That’s why suburban communities are not unheard of to spring close to golf courses.

Ron Sarabi played golf for charity, along with his wife Leila, at the Health Net Charity Golf Tournament. Ron Sarabi is an avid golfer, philanthropist and businessman. He is the General Manager for Hawaiian Gardens Casino in California.Ron Sarabi is a leader and member of the California Gambling Control Commission.

OPTIMISM MONTH: March 1- 31, 2006

Are you an optimist or a pessimist? Do you often expect bad things to happen? Pessimists are like the fairy tale about Chicken Little. In the fairy tale, Chicken Little kept shouting, ‘Help, help the sky is falling’. In contrast, optimistic people expect the best. Don’t worry however, I co- founded OPTIMISM MONTH, which runs from March 1st -31st, 2005. If you’re a pessimist don’t get discouraged. Optimism is not a disposition you are born with or without. It’s a learned skill, and a very important ingredient determining your level of happiness. I suggest practicing these tips each week of Optimism Month:

Week 1: De-tox Your Mind

To get rid of negative or intruding bad thoughts remember this “Rule of Optimism”: You can only keep one thought in your mind at a time. You can focus your thoughts on either pessimistic or optimistic thoughts. It’s your choice. Pessimistic people focus on gloomy thoughts of how they could fall down and not get up. They expect the worst to happen. Optimistic people expect the best. So, houseclean your head. This week, when setbacks or problems pop-up, immediately focus on finding a solution. Pessimistic people focus on complaining, but happy and optimistic people focus on solutions.

Week 2: Optimism and Happiness by the Numbers

Are you obsessed with negative thoughts? A simple way to become optimistic is to count your way to more positive thoughts. It’s easy to become an expert at switching your negative and bad thoughts to more positive and upbeat thoughts and feelings. So, this week your assignment is to focus on counting and switching your bad thoughts to upbeat and uplifting thoughts. Each time you have a negative thought, immediately switch to a positive thought or solutions to your woes. Write a tally mark on a pad of paper each time you switch like this each day. Your goal is to decrease the number of times you need to switch. For example, at first you may need to switch 50 times. In time, you will decrease it to 30, 20 or 10 times a day. If you are obsessively negative, you will become obsessively positive using this technique.

Week 3: Avoid Emotional Vampires

Are you a loser magnet? Do you attract emotional vampires or losers into your life? To become more optimistic — avoid emotional vampires. Pessimistic people allow “emotional vampires” to suck their positive feelings right out of their skulls. Emotional vampires include people who put you down, criticize you or mock or sabotage your dreams and aspirations. This week, take survey of your life by making a list of people and situations you are exposing yourself to. Then, discard or limit people, habits or situations that keep you from feeling optimistic and happy. In other words, “burn your bridges” if needed. Remember: Happy and optimistic people hang around with personal cheerleaders. Unhappy people surround themselves with emotional vampires.

Week 4: Act Like An Optimist

To begin acting like an optimist yourself, you need to learn what they do. Optimistic people act and carry themselves in certain ways. First, they use certain words. The words people use can effect their mood. Changing your words can actually change your attitude and feelings. I recommend using “upbeat” words instead of “upset” words. For example, you can say, “I feel overwhelmed.” Or, “I feel challenged … nevertheless I can do it”. Second, optimists and happy individuals take big steps, walk faster and stand taller. In sharp contrast, pessimistic and unhappy people shuffle their feet, take tiny steps, walk slowly and slouch. This week, use upbeat words and watch how you carry your body. Use the word choices and body posture of optimistic people.

Using each of these techniques during Optimism Month will help you become happy and optimistic. They are easy to carry out and will create a positive domino effect with people in your life.

Maryann Troiani, Psy.D., is a speaker & consultant with The Mercer Group, Inc., in Barrington, Illinois. She delivers speeches & workshops at meetings & conferences. She co-authored the book, “SPONTANEOUS OPTIMISM: Proven Strategies for Health, Prosperity & Happiness”. Dr. Troiani has tele-coached people with her ‘optimism & change-your-life” techniques. She has appeared on Oprah & hundred of TV & radio shows. You can email her at drmary@mercersystems.com or call 847-382-0690.

Have you ever imagined that life could be a lot better and more fulfilling than yours is right now? Are you eager to learn a self improvement technique that will make it so?

If you are read on.

I am going to lay down 7 simple steps for your self improvement plan. Whether you implement the self improvement steps I give you is your decision alone.

Self Improvement Tip 1
This tip will seem quite obvious and simple to you, but you’ll be amazed how few actually take the effort to do it.

Unless you’re not a morning person this self improvement tip will drastically change the quality of your day towards the positive.

Setting you in a good mood to face the days challenges and adversities.

Get Up Early!
This may sound more like a way to ruin your day by putting you in an awful mood, but bear with me on this.

To be able to accomplish this and still avoid losing any any precious sleep. You can go to bed just a half hour earlier since to start with you only need to get up a half hour earlier than you usually do.

To aid this purpose you should definitely use an alarm clock with persistent beeping.

You may be wondering by now just what it is that you’re supposed to do in this extra half hour when you would normally be dozing peacefully in bed and how this has anything to do with self improvement.

For different people the answer can vary slightly. To start with you need to fully awaken yourself and get rid of early morning sluggishness.

To suit this purpose you can take a cold or slightly cool shower. Or you might try doing stretches combined with deep breathing.

You might skip the shower if just splashing cold water on your face is sufficient to wake you. Use whatever works for you.

After you’re completely alert step outside of your house, apartment, etc… And if it’s early enough and you have a clear view, watch the sunrise.

This simple but immensely satisfying act will lift your spirits and help with self improvement. If you’re unable to do this, take a brisk walk, jog or run depending upon what you prefer and what you’re physically capable of.

When you’ve been out for 20 minutes you can head inside and commence with whatever morning ritual you normally have.

Self Improvement Tip 2

Now this is extremely important but deceitfully obvious. Eat Breakfast.

To start your day out on the right foot and stay in keeping with your self improvement plan this is practically a necessity. You need the energy this will provide you with to accomplish your daily tasks.

If you are overly pressed for time you might try cereal and milk or a few granola bars, even a few pieces of fresh fruit would do.

Any of these are better alternatives than skipping breakfast.

This is also a good suggestion for those watching their weight, because if you skip breakfast you’re more likely to binge later in the day. And you certainly won’t be helping your self improvement by gaining
unwanted weight.

Self Improvement Tip 3
When you go places, even if you find it a bit difficult at first, smile more at other people. Just curve your lips up a bit as you make eye contact with another human being.

It’s really that simple. This will not only lift your spirits as you see a good many people smile back, but it will lift other people’s as well. Even the ones who are too shy to smile back.

Be sure to read Part 2 of this article which contains the last 4 tips on self improvement.

For more of Beth’s expert advice Click Here to visit her website now.

Are you one of the many Americans of means and wealth and sincerely would like to stay that way? It is said that money cannot by you happiness, but it is known that being broke will not make you happy either. In fact a citizen of a nation like the United States maybe rich and happy or poor and happy. Or they might be rich and unhappy or poor and unhappy. Now then if you were to take a box drawn on a piece of paper and then section it into four smaller boxes by putting a plus sign inside and then writing; Rich and happy; poor and happy; poor and unhappy; rich and unhappy; in those boxes; then which box would you choose to live in? Probably the Rich and Happy one right?

Sure that was a tough guess indeed, wasn’t it? So what you are telling me is the “YOU” are preferring to stay rich and be happy? Good, I agree it shows at least that you are rich and smart; of course we will save the ‘rich and smart’ scenario for another article. Let’s us focus now on ‘your happiness.’ Since are reading this article you are Rich, which is a good thing. Either you made your money the old fashioned way; you earned it working hard and smart or you inherited it. The important thing now is that you number one keep it and number two let it work for you rather than it owning you.

I suppose at this point most would tell you to go get a good financial planner if you do not already have one, but since you are a smart person chances are you already have one. Now then you need to concentrate on the “happiness” part of the quadratic equation. You need to find out what makes you happy? You need a hobby or something fun to do right?

Sure, well take a yellow note pad and put on a giant “T” on it. Now write on the top “Happiness” and next write on the right side all those things you love to do and wish you had more time to do them. On the left side write all those things you dislike doing. If you are unsure of an item, whether you like or dislike it let it straddle the line. Next take all those things you like to do on another sheet of paper and put them in order from one-fifty.

Oh you do not have 50 things you like to do? Well then you are rich, smart, seeking happiness and limited. Limited is not good. So you need to go out and try new things and experiences to help you expand your list. Pick things which do not cost much first, as you want to stay rich, so if you think traveling is fun, book a cruise or package holiday to somewhere far away that looks pretty. If you think learning to fly would be fun, spend $100.00 on an introductory flight, but do not commit to lessons until you have tried fifty things. You may come back to it or you may not, you see? So go do that right away okay? Think on this.

“Lance Winslow” – Online Think Tank forum board. If you have innovative thoughts and unique perspectives, come think with Lance; www.WorldThinkTank.net/wttbbs/

Why Are You Here?

When I ask this question, I’m not inquiring why you are in the location you’re in, or why you are in the city you’re in, or even why you are in whatever country you’re in.

I ask the question, because I’m wondering why you exist at all?

In the fall of 2003, I released a book I wrote called The Why Are You Here Café. It is a fiction story of a man who wanders into an all night café and is surprised to find three questions on a menu. Why Are You Here? Do You Fear Death? Are You Fulfilled?

I am not so arrogant now to think that I have the answer to how anyone except for me should live their life. I do know though, that there are certain things I’ve learned that help me think about life in a different way. There are things that I wish I had learned earlier in life, things that I reflect on often and that continually give me a boost and help me on my journey to achieve the life of my dreams.

My hope is that in sharing those things with you, they will in some way assist you on your journey to live the life of your dreams.

1. Know your Purpose For Existing (PFE), or at least be looking

Your Purpose For Existing is exactly what it says. It is the reason you exist, the reason you are alive. It is the answer to the question I asked you at the start of this article. Why Are You Here?

Your PFE is like your own personal compass for life. Should you go to New York City and become a commodities trader? Go back to your PFE. Why are you here? Should you travel the world as a peace corp. volunteer? Go back to your PFE. Why are you here? Should you stay in a relationship you’ve been questioning? Go back to your PFE. Why are you here?

In addition to taking a great deal of the stress out of decision making, it also takes a lot of the anxiety out of everyday life. You don’t have to justify to yourself or anyone else why you do what you do. You know the answer. You meet someone and they say, “Hi, what do you do?” You respond, “Oh, I teach yoga,” or “I’m an insurance salesperson,” or “I’m a chiropractor.” “Interesting,” they say, “what made you go into that line of work. “Well, it helps fulfill my Purpose For Existing,” you respond. Wow! That is a powerful statement. You do what you do because it helps you fulfill the exact reason you exist. It doesn’t get much simpler, or more powerful than that.

2. Fear is a terrible thing; don’t let it control your life.

Someone once told me a great quote about trying something new. He said he had been battling with fear for a long time until one day his friend told him, “Listen, realistically what’s the worst that could happen.” I think that is great comment to remember. We are often paralyzed into non-action by the concern that something drastic might happen. But the reality is that almost any decision we make or action we take can be changed if we don’t like the outcome.

We can almost always go back to whatever it was we were doing before we tried something new. Furthermore, what are the odds that the “worst thing” will happen? It probably isn’t likely at all, and yet that remote chance keeps us from doing the things we want to do.

My major “Aha” moment which enabled me to get past my fears, came one day when I suddenly realized that there are very few things that have not already been done by at least one, and probably thousands of people. Certainly everything I was attempting, other people had already tried and succeeded at. Well heck, I thought. If they could do it, so can I.

It is likely that whatever you are trying to accomplish in life, someone, at some point in history, at some spot in the world, did it, and proved it could be done. If they could do it, so can you.

3. Either we can live as a speck of meaningless existence, or we can live a life of meaning

Have you ever been somewhere on a very clear night when you could get a great look at the stars? You were in a place nice and dark without any local lights distracting your eyes. How many stars do you think you could see with your naked eye when you looked across the whole sky? It seemed like millions I bet. The sky seemed just packed with stars. Well, the reality is that the immense quantity of stars you see on a totally clear night when there is no outside light is actually about 3,000.

To put that number in perspective, keep in mind that in our galaxy alone, there are 100 billion stars. Now, our star, which is the sun, has 9 planets and 54 moons that rotate around it. Using our star as a proxy, that means there are 6.3 TRILLION stars, planets, and moons floating around in our galaxy. So what you see on a perfectly clear night, that immense amount of stars and space, is around .00000005% of everything in our galaxy. Amazing isn’t it. Now consider this. That is just our galaxy. Do you know how many galaxies there are? Scientists estimate there are over 500 million of them.

So with all that as perspective, how important are our individual lives in comparison to the entire universe? It is pretty easy to see how someone could think that they are just a speck of meaningless existence. Certainly we are all just specks in the big picture. But suppose we aren’t meaningless. Suppose there is a specific purpose that each of us is here, a reason that we exist right now that goes beyond just sperm met egg and nine months later out popped a little you or me.

I believe there is a reason. I believe we each have a specific Purpose For Existing, or PFE as I like to refer to it. My suggestions is, find that purpose. Fulfill that purpose.

I’ve had people say to me, “But what if you are wrong?” “What if I think I have a PFE, and I live my life like I do, but I really am just a speck of meaningless existence?” My reply to that is always the same. If we find what we think is our very purpose for being alive, our purpose for existing, and we live a life to fulfill it, then by default, we will have given meaning to our life. What has meaning, can no longer be meaningless.

4. Realize something is fulfilling because we decide it is fulfilling, not because someone else tells us it is.

There are a lot of people out there trying to get you to buy things, and they will tell you almost anything to get you to do it.

Do you know how much money was spent on advertising in the United States last year? The answer is a staggering $124 billion dollars. The goal of those expenditures is to get you and me to buy things, and advertisers are getting more and more savvy about how to do it.

For example, they have learned that memory and emotion are significant factors in whether or not a customer has brand loyalty to a product. So they review brain responses of test subjects who are shown advertisements, to see if a particular advertisement invokes a reaction from the emotion center or memory center of the test subject’s brain. That way they can tell if the advertisement will stimulate long term brand loyalty for a particular product. Can’t you just see that? Someone is walking down the street, they pass a billboard, and suddenly have this tremendous, compelling, yet unexplainable urge to buy lottery tickets.

Are we to that point yet? No, I don’t think so. Will we get to that point? I don’t know. The point is, marketers and marketing technology are, and will continue to, make it harder and harder to sift through all the noise so that we can form our own perspective on things.

The challenge is to realize something is fulfilling not because someone tells us it is, but because we individually determine it is fulfilling. Does love really come in the form of diamond earrings, which say “You love her and would marry her all over again”? Does self worth and empowerment truly lie in owning a particular automobile? I personally don’t think so in either case, but don’t listen to me anymore than you would listen to the advertisement. You decide.

5. Be thankful for and leverage the advantages that come from living in this country

We have some amazing opportunities at our fingertips simply because we live in this country. Now, I don’t know about you, but all I did to get these opportunities was pop out of the womb in what turned out to be a very fortuitous spot.

Do you know how much the average college graduate in Myanmar (formerly Burma) makes? They make 10,000 Kat per month. That is about $12.00 U.S. How about the average college graduate in China? How much do you think they make per month? That number is 1500 Yuen, which is just under $200.00 U.S.

Now salaries of that magnitude are enough for those people to function in their country’s respective economies. In all likelihood though, those people will never be able to travel and see the world. They just can’t afford it. But we can. We have the financial benefit of a strong currency compared to the majority of the world.

In this country we can get an education, and we can go out and get a decent paying job. We think unemployment is really getting bad when it hits 6%. In places in South Africa it is over 40%.

As a country we have our fair share of problems. When you get outside the borders and travel to other places, you see things that make the U.S. look like paradise. We have freedom. We can say what we want, buy what we want, become what we want, travel where we want, and for the most part the only thing we did to get all this, is pop out of the womb in the right geographical area. We shouldn’t take it for granted.

6. Look at the little picture, but with a big perspective

People often say, look at the big picture. I say look at the little picture, but with a big perspective.

Do you know what life is? Life is actually a day multiplied by about 27,500. Sometimes it is less, hopefully more, but usually around 27,500. The easiest way to make sure we have a life we enjoy is to make sure that each day we do something we enjoy. I’m sure this sounds simple to you. It took me decades to figure this out.

Doing something you enjoy each day is an example of looking at the little picture. But keep in mind the big perspective, which is what is your PFE? What is it that you want out of life? Why are you here?

Here is an example of little picture and big perspective. Do you do some form of work for at least 20 minutes each weekday? Do you go to a job, work from home, something? How about this. Do you wake up each weekday and stretch for at least 20 minutes?

Ok, different question. What is more important to you, health or money? Would you permanently trade the ability to walk up a flight of stairs in exchange for money? Would you permanently trade the ability to take a bike ride along the beach, garden, lift up a grandchild, play sports, or go fishing in exchange for money?

Then be careful about how you spend your time each day, because making the decision to head off to work 20 minutes early, or spending an extra 20 minutes at work, instead of taking 20 minutes per day to stretch, is a slow version of trading those abilities.

We have a propensity as a society to spend all kinds of time on other things, and when we are good and tired and barely have the energy to say hello, then we go interact with those who mean the most to us, or spend time on ourselves. This is the fast track to finding yourself feeling like a complete stranger with the people who mean the most to you, and yourself.

7. Seek out near life experiences

At the age of 28 I began to have near life experiences. Have you heard the term near death experience? That is when people survive a heart attack, or almost get hit by a car and they get this tremendous sense of lucidness about how short life is and how they should give some thought to how they really want to live it before they don’t have a life to live.

Well, at 28 I started to have those revelations without the potential for a trip to the emergency room. I started to have near life experiences.

Near life experiences are the times when you are doing exactly what you want. You are enjoying life, you are having the exact experience you want out of life, and because of that you feel truly fulfilled with the life experience. Near life experiences (NLE’s) can come from something as simple as hugging your significant other or as complex as achieving a particularly difficult goal you set for yourself. They come when you are fulfilling your PFE.

When you are having a near life experience, you are absolutely and completely happy. It is the most amazing feeling in the world.

Find those moments for yourself and figure out how to get more of them into your life every day. Experience so many of them that you get to the point where you insist on having a life full of them, a life where you fulfill your PFE.

Have them as soon as possible, because the fantastic thing about experiences, especially near life experiences, is that the sooner in your life you have them, the longer you have to reap the benefits. What you learn at 20, 35, or 50 can be applied for a lot more time and to a lot more situations than what you learn at 85. Even better, the experiences build upon each other. Once the insights start coming, they create this fantastic foundation of knowledge upon which everything else rests.

8. Choose your own metric of success in life

When you have spent time in other countries, and then you come back to the U.S., you realize just how strongly our culture equates success with money. How much do you make? What kind of car do you drive? How big is your house? These are all money based metrics.

If we choose that as our metric, that’s fine, just so long as we make sure that we chose it. And when we are deciding what our metric will be, we should keep in mind that money is not the only one. The amount of time we spend each day doing what we want, our degree of fulfillment with life, how happy we are, how much love is in our life, and many others, are also metrics for success in life.

Evaluate them closely because the metrics we choose become the driving force for our actions.

9. Act like your life depends on your decisions, because it does

Have you ever been in a discussion where you were debating what to do, and someone said, “Well what would you do if your life depended on it?” It really puts things in a different perspective doesn’t it? Now all of a sudden it is more important. MY LIFE DEPENDS ON IT!!!

Well, in reality, our life depends on the decisions we make every day. Whether or not we achieve and experience what we want out of life is entirely dependent on our daily decisions.

Have you ever heard the term “The Big Five”? The big five is something that you hear all the time when you are on safari in Africa. It stands for rhino, elephant, buffalo, leopard, and lion. People are always asking, “Have you seen the big five? How many of the big five did you see? Where were the big five?”…

I think we should adopt this term for our lives. The Big Five for Life will be the five things we absolutely want to do, see, or experience in our life. The things that on our deathbeds, we will look back on and go, yeah, I did my Big Five for Life.

Wouldn’t that be a great conversation starter? “Hi, I’m John, and you are?…” “Nice to meet you. So, what’s on your Big Five for Life list and how can I help you fulfill them?”

Although they can be, items on the Big Five for Life list don’t have to be things that are one time events. For example, number one on my list is to have a lifelong loving relationship with my wife. It is something with a non-defined end date. As long as I am here, it is on the list.

The reason I think this would be so fantastic is because we often forget to act like our life depends on our decisions. We get into a pattern and pretty soon we have all these reasons why we can’t go do the things we want.

Make your daily decisions as if your life depends on it, because it does.

10. Choose to work on things you are passionate about and you will always be passionate about what you are working on

Here is a statistic you may find shocking. It shocked me. In an average week, including the two days of the weekend, a person will spend over 52% of their awake life either at work, getting to work, or on work related activities at home.

Over half of our awake life is spent on work. Now that is something to keep in mind when we are making decisions about what type of work we want to do. “I am choosing to give half of my life to the pursuit of whatever this job is.”

If you are going to spend 52% of your awake life on work related items each week, you might as well choose to work on something you are passionate about. I know this can be challenging. We live in this interesting world where people value experience at something over much more important skills like aptitude, general intelligence, drive and many more.

Nonetheless, think of it this way. If there is something else that you have always wanted to do, but lack experience in, every day you don’t go do it is a day less of experience you will have. You might as well get started right away.

John Strelecky is the international best selling author of ‘The Why Are You Here Café.’ In its first 10 months his book had sold in 14 countries and set the world record for the fastest sales on all seven continents. Through his book, articles, speeches, and appearances on television and radio, he has positively impacted the lives of millions of people.

John recently announced his “Inspire 2 Million” initiative. His goal is to inspire two million of the people who he helps create and live their perfect lives, to each donate $1 to a non-profit organization he started called Inspire Two Million. As part of the initiative, John is donating 10% of all proceeds from the sale of ‘The Why Are You Here Café.’ The $2 million+ in donations will be distributed to a select group of charities that support cancer research, children’s education, marine life preservation, and AIDS research. To find out more about Inspire Two Million, or to make a donation, visit http://www.inspire2million.com

To have John appear as a speaker for your organization contact jstrelecky@whycafe.com.